"dearest kor,you know how 'anyone could ask for' is so overused it sort of diminishes the significance of it, so rather than saying that, thank you for being the best elder brother i could ever have asked for. through the 21 years we've been siblings, there were fleeting moments when you felt like ripping my hair out, and me, yours (its harder for me though because the shortness of your hair makes gripping it, much less pulling an almost impossible task); but then, there are those treasured times when i'm so glad that i've got you with me, to share, to laugh with, to care for. and whilst i'm always going on about how i wish i had a sister, i don't, and wouldn't wish for any less of a brother than that that i've got in you. many times, i forget, and take you for granted. i hardly ever sit down to think about how wonderful a brother i've got, so as i'm writing this in london (this time, without you here with me), i'm suddenly aware of the void that fills our home here without your presence; i'm suddenly aware that i don't get texts from you telling me not to come home too late; i never come back to surprise strawberry tarts in the fridge anymore; i don't have you asking me 'what shall we have for dinner today'... all i really want to say is that you've become so much a part of who i am that without you, i really wouldn't know who i am because you have been a constant in my life, keeping me grounded, giving me the assurance i need when i'm in doubt, being genuine. so thank you, kor. and all i hope, on your birthday, is for you to stay safe, and that you continue to find happiness in whatever you are doing.